How To Negotiate Salary Without Offending

Negotiating a starting salary can be a slippery slope. Make a mistake and you can leave more than money on the table. No employer wants to be bullied into paying extra, but on the same token, potential employees don’t want to undercut themselves when it comes to accepting a salary offer. While it’s easy to offend somebody during the negotiation process, there are ways to do it effectively and successfully, without upsetting either side. Consider these tips:

Is There Room for Negotiation

According to career experts, the first step is to see if there is really any reason to negotiate at all.

“Before you walk in the door you have to find out what is the going rate for your position and experience,” says Patricia Sweeney, human resource manager at Old Colony Hospice and Palliative Care. “If you are going into a small non-profit hoping to make $80,000 a year, chances are that’s not going to happen. You need to know the industry you are going into.”

Joel Garfinkle, author of Get Paid What You’re Worth, says you shouldn’t go in expecting to get double what you are offered. “Demanding more money and waiving another offer in their face typically doesn’t work,” he says.

Not only research the going rate for your position and experience, but also do your homework on the company you are interviewing for. Are they profitable, are they growing, do they have high turnover or have a reputation for under paying employees, are all things you want to know ahead of time.

Figure Out What You Want Ahead Of Time

Setting a range for what you are willing to take and what will make you walk away is also important to negotiating successfully. According to Jack Chapman, a career coach and author of Negotiating Your Salary, How to Make $1000 a Minute, you should have an ideal number, a satisfactory number and a no-go number set in your mind. The ideal number should be how much you would want to make in the perfect situation. It should pass the laugh test but it shouldn’t be too low either. “Ask yourself what would be ideal more than straight cash,” says Chapman. “Maybe it’s some equity in the company, a bonus or no travel when the there’s usually 25% travel.”

The satisfactory number is the one that’s based more on research and what you can bring to the company. Pursue help wanted ads and Internet sites to find out what people in your field are getting paid. Garfinkle says many companies list a salary range in job postings to make candidates aware of what to expect.

The no-go number is the number that you will turn down and the amount that you are willing to walk away over. If you have your numbers in your head before the interview, not only will you negotiate from a position of strength, but you also won’t be tempted to take a lowball offer, says Chapman.

Keep Your Arrogance in Check

Once you are in talks with the company, a way to see how their leaning toward negotiations is to ask them why they are hiring you, says Jim Camp founder of the Camp Negotiation Institute. “You want to see what they see in you,” he says. If the employer says you’re not the most qualified, but we think you will learn on the job, then it’s probably not smart to try to negotiate the highest salary for that position. But if they say you are the most qualified for the job, then you know you’re worth more to the company than the other candidates.

Camp says to not only focus on the salary when it comes to negotiating. Take into account the value of stock options, the retirement program, medical benefits and vacation time. “When we negotiate we want to negotiate all the possible ingredients of the package. We don’t want to miss one,” he says.

Even if you are a world renowned heart surgeon or a crack software programmer, you have to maintain a humble attitude during the negotiations. If you are too cocky, no matter how great you think you are, it could backfire. Same goes for only caring about money. That sends the message that you are only as loyal as the highest bidder.  “You may be the best candidate for the job, but rarely will you be the only candidate for a job in today’s market,” says Garfinkle. “Arrogance can often lead to the employer selecting the next best candidate.”

Donna Fuscaldo is a freelance journalist hailing out of Long Island, New York. Donna writes for numerous online publications including FoxBusiness.com, Bankrate.com, AARP.com, Insurance.com and Houselogic.com. As a personal finance reporter for years, Donna provides invaluable advice on everything from saving money to landing that dream job. She also writes a weekly column for FoxBusiness.com focused on technology for small businesses. Previously, Donna was an equities reporter for Dow Jones Newswires and a special contributor to the Wall Street Journal. Through the Glassdoor Blog, Donna will provide tips on how to find a job and more importantly keep it.

  • Anonymous

    I think that the employees seeming arrogant is not really the core problem with matching positions to employees, as the article seems to imply — just as problematic is the arrogance of many employers, who take advantage of the perception of a “bad economy”. When negotiating, it’s quite simple — ask for what you’re worth in the position in a nice and cooperative manner — don’t think back over your language a thousand times to make sure you don’t offend anybody — just be true to yourself. Stand up for yourself, make sure you get a fair deal and communicate, communicate, communicate! It’s essential that both you and the employer have a clear picture of how you’re benefiting each other and that there’s no resentment on either side (including yours) — resentment never leads anywhere: you’re not valuable to your employer if, rather than thinking about the problems that need to be solved in your job, you’re constantly thinking back to how you got taken advantage of — communication, cooperation, and asserting that you be treated with respect by your employers are the only way to achieve long-term success in today’s (and any other) economy.

    That said, good managers understand the above and never try to low-ball anybody. Good people, in general, understand that it’s just bad karma to do so. Because of this, while the economy may be a little worse now than it was 10 years ago, it’s important to resist the temptation to accept an offer that gives the perception that the employer is trying to take advantage of you — even if the offer is later increased when you ask for more. Especially in a position in which the requirements are not clear, the action of trying to low-ball you demonstrates that the employer will likely try to take advantage of you in the future and that they value money more than your relationship with them. Because of this, the environment that you’ll be stepping into will be competitive, rather than cooperative, and you will have to add “playing politics” (or “stakeholder influence” or whatever the fancy name is now) to the list of job requirements for the position.

    In general, remember: respect yourself and have high self-esteem. If that seems tough, consult a psychotherapist. We are all valuable and all have something to offer and we can all accomplish great things — and have fun doing it — if we just treat each other with respect.

  • Anonymous

    It is impossible for an employer to feel “bullied” by a candidate into accepting an offer, as the first paragraph implies. You may get turned down or they may feel your request is unreasonable, but don’t be concerned with someone labeling you a bully. If anyone is being a bully, it’s them. If anyone gets offended by your requests, that’s a sign that these people are slighted easily and a signal of an environment in which you’ll have to fight to keep your job, an environment in which you as a person don’t matter, an environment in which, to take the words from the last paragraph, you are only as valuable as the lowest bidder, an environment in which your managers are selfish, greedy and insecure…bottom line: an environment you don’t want to work in.

    Oh and don’t maintain a “humble attitude”. Maintain an attitude that shows that you value your skills and what you bring to the table. Maintain an attitude that shows the employer exactly what they’re getting for the price they’re paying. Maintain an attitude that demonstrates that building a relationship requires work on both sides to maintain and that you are willing to work hard to maintain it. Maintain an attitude that you are worthy, know your worth, and can communicate your worth effectively. Maintain an attitude of goodness, cooperativeness, and loving kindness. You are worth it!

  • joel garfinkle

    I think you make a very good observation, psherm85. You
    definitely need an environment you want to work in. An employer who is only
    concerned with getting the best deal when they make a hire likely isn’t a
    company most of us would be happy with for long. You’re absolutely right on
    that point. Finding an employer who values you as a person is critical to being
    fulfilled in your career. However, the same is true on the other side of the
    hiring desk, and I believe that’s the point Ms. Fuscaldo was trying to make.

    I think you make a very good observation, psherm85. You
    definitely need an environment you want to work in. An employer who is only
    concerned with getting the best deal when they make a hire likely isn’t a
    company most of us would be happy with for long. You’re absolutely right on
    that point. Finding an employer who values you as a person is critical to being
    fulfilled in your career. However, the same is true on the other side of the
    hiring desk, and I believe that’s the point Ms. Fuscaldo was trying to make.

    Just as we want employers who look at us as an individual,
    with benefits beyond simply our work output-to-paycheck ratio, employers want
    employees who are interested in benefits beyond simply their salary. If you
    give the employer the impression that your number one concern is money and not
    the opportunity presented by the company, they will assume you’ll leave their
    company should another offer come along with a higher salary. Giving the
    impression that you are only loyal as long as you’re paid top dollar would lead
    the employer to feeling “bullied.” Most likely, it would also lead to your
    offer being rescinded.

    I would agree with you that perhaps “humble” is not the
    descriptor I would have chosen for a proper candidate’s attitude. However, I
    think Ms. Fuscaldo is trying to warn candidates about the dangers of going into
    an interview arrogantly. There is a firm line between confidence and cockiness.
    You should definitely be sure of the value you bring to the company and discuss
    why your skills and experience are the best fit. However, a candidate who tries
    to negotiate an offer will have a greater chance of success if they approach
    the negotiations with tact and their ego in check.

    I would agree with you that perhaps “humble” is not the
    descriptor I would have chosen for a proper candidate’s attitude. However, I
    think Ms. Fuscaldo is trying to warn candidates about the dangers of going into
    an interview arrogantly. There is a firm line between confidence and cockiness.
    You should definitely be sure of the value you bring to the company and discuss
    why your skills and experience are the best fit. However, a candidate who tries
    to negotiate an offer will have a greater chance of success if they approach
    the negotiations with tact and their ego afdafdsafd;a; adsf;l jas;fl

    leave their
    company should another offer come along with a higher salary. Giving the
    impression that you are only loyal as long as you’re paid top dollar would lead
    the employer to feeling “bullied.” Most likely, it would also lead to your
    offer being rescinded.

    I would agree with you that perhaps “humble” is not the
    descriptor I would have chosen for a proper candidate’s attitude. However, I
    think Ms. Fuscaldo is trying to warn candidates about the dangers of going into
    an interview arrogantly. There is a firm line between confidence and cockiness.
    You should definitely be sure of the value you bring to the company and discuss
    why your skills and experience are the best fit. However, a candidate who tries
    to negotiate an offer will have a greater chance of success if they approach
    the negotiations with tact and their ego in check.adf

  • joel garfinkle

    Are there employers who try to low ball candidates when
    presenting an offer? Absolutely! However, this happens whether it’s a good or
    bad economy. Some companies simply are more interested in hiring a candidate at
    a bargain basement salary, than hiring the best candidate for their position.
    These companies typically have high turnover and likely aren’t the most
    competitive in their industry, for this reason. That is why it’s so important
    to do your research before even going in for the interview. You should know
    what the fair market value is for your position and then factor in your unique
    experience and skills and the value they bring to that specific company.

    However, the “bad economy” isn’t a perception. The reality
    is unemployment is still extremely high. Figures presented by the mass media
    don’t take into account those who are currently underemployed or who have
    fallen of the unemployment roles. For this reason, there are more candidates
    applying for positions than in recent decades. The laws of supply and demand
    definitely do affect job offers. An increasingly globalized economy, resulting
    in a hyper-competitive environment for many businesses, also affects salaries
    as companies look to trim fat everywhere they can from their budgets –
    including salaries. Therefore, unless you have a very specific and highly sought
    after skill set, right now you just don’t see the prevalence of sign-on bonuses
    and premium salaries that were seen 10 to 15 years ago.

    I will definitely agree with you regarding the need to find
    an employer who sees how you benefit one another. An employer who sees your
    potential and values the skills and experience you bring to the table is worth
    more, in the long run, than an initial salary offer. The key is to remember
    that a job offer is more than a salary number. It is also the opportunity that
    exists within that company and how that opportunity aligns with your career
    goals.