Thinking of working here?
My advice: pour yourself a strong drink, read every Glassdoor review twice, and then ask if you are ready for the corporate equivalent of a pub quiz where the answers change halfway through.
Some call it a car crash. I’d say it is more like a rush hour tailback, with plenty of honking, little movement, and everyone convinced they are in the fast lane while going nowhere.
Others call it a sinking ship but that feels too generous, perhaps a rubber dinghy having been excessively over-inflated but now letting out a constant wheeze from a puncture, while leadership insists it will “revolutionise the seas.”
Employees are called a “Tribe,” but it feels more like Lord of the Flies. Those holding the conch dominate, fresh ideas vanish, and every January brings the “strategic realignment,” otherwise known as the annual cull. Most get six to twelve months to learn how to swim among unhelpful sharks before being cut adrift, while a handful survive year after year, loyal to the last, enduring the Hunger Games and scavenging on what is left behind.
Support is best described as an interpretive dance, interesting to watch but impossible to follow.
Leadership style: Imagine a giant motivational poster that simply says
¯\(ツ)/¯
Silence is treated as strategy, neglect dressed as empowerment, until you point it out and then suddenly you are on the fast track to the exit.
In short, if you enjoy chaos dressed as culture, mystery management as leadership, and the thrill of wondering whether you will make it to next year’s round of redundancies, this may be the adventure for you. Everyone else might want to keep scrolling.
